Where and how your baby sleeps matters, and following the safer sleep advice lowers the risk of sudden infant death syndrome, sometimes called cot death. Exhaustion in the early weeks is real, and I would always rather talk safer sleep through honestly with parents than have a family too tired to think it through. This guide sets out the basics. It is based on the guidance from the NHS and the Lullaby Trust, who are the trusted authorities on safer sleep in the UK, and I would always point you to them for the fullest, most up to date advice.

Always sleep your baby on their back

Place your baby on their back for every sleep, day and night. Back sleeping is much safer than sleeping on the front or side. Once your baby can roll both ways on their own, they can find their own position, but you should still always start them on their back.

Give your baby a clear, flat and separate sleep space

Your baby is safest sleeping in their own clear, flat sleep space, such as a cot, crib or Moses basket. That means:

  • A firm, flat and waterproof mattress in good condition, with a fitted sheet.
  • No pillows, duvets, cot bumpers, pods, nests or soft toys for young babies.
  • Baby placed in the feet to foot position, with their feet at the bottom of the cot so they cannot wriggle down under the covers.
  • Light, well fitting blankets tucked in no higher than the shoulders, or a correctly sized baby sleep bag.

Share a room for the first six months

The safest place for your baby to sleep is in their own cot or basket in the same room as you, for the first six months, for both day and night sleeps. Room sharing makes it easier to feed, comfort and keep an eye on your baby, and it lowers the risk of sudden infant death.

Keep your baby smoke free

Keeping your baby away from smoke, in pregnancy and after birth, is one of the most protective things you can do. Do not let anyone smoke near your baby, and keep your home and car smoke free.

Do not let your baby get too hot

Babies sleep best in a room that is a comfortable temperature, around sixteen to twenty degrees. Dress your baby in light layers, keep their head uncovered indoors, and check they are not too hot by feeling their chest or the back of their neck. Their hands and feet often feel cool, and that is normal.

Never sleep with your baby on a sofa or armchair

Sleeping with your baby on a sofa or in an armchair is extremely dangerous and should always be avoided, as your baby can slip into a position where they cannot breathe. If you think you might fall asleep while feeding or cuddling, it is far safer to feed in your bed, having made it safer first, than to risk dozing off on a sofa or chair.

The truth about sharing a bed

Many parents share a bed with their baby at some point, sometimes without planning to. It is safer to think about it in advance. Bed sharing is more dangerous, and should always be avoided, if:

  • You or your partner smoke, whatever your baby's age.
  • You or your partner have drunk alcohol, or taken any drug or medication that makes you sleepy.
  • Your baby was born premature, or at a low birth weight.

If none of these apply and you do bed share, make it safer by keeping pillows and adult bedding away from your baby, making sure they cannot fall out or get trapped, and always placing them on their back. The Lullaby Trust has detailed guidance on safer bed sharing, and it is well worth reading.

Where to read the full guidance

For the complete and current advice, please see the NHS safer sleep guidance and the Lullaby Trust. They are the authorities on this, and their advice is kept fully up to date.

Speak to your midwife or health visitor if:

  • You are not sure your baby's sleep space is safe.
  • You are so tired you are worried about falling asleep while feeding.
  • You want to talk through safer sleep for your family.

Call 999 or take your baby straight to A&E if your baby:

  • Is floppy or unresponsive
  • Will not wake for feeds
  • Is having trouble breathing, or their lips, tongue or gums look blue or grey
  • Has a sunken fontanelle
  • Is visibly jaundiced and unwell with it, for example floppy, hard to wake or not feeding. Yellowing shows most clearly in the whites of the eyes, the gums, and the palms and soles
  • Has dark urine or pale, chalky stools

How a consultation helps

Feeding and sleep are closely tied together in the early weeks, and exhaustion is part of why unsafe sleep happens. When I visit, part of what I do is help you feed in a way that is calmer and more sustainable at night, so you are less likely to end up dozing off somewhere unsafe. It is a practical, non-judgemental conversation, and I will always point you to the NHS and Lullaby Trust for the full safer sleep advice.